the burger king is creepy
''... shot in the ass with an arrow by a turkey.''
Why do men like lesbians? It's not like women fantasize about 2 gay men (at least I don't).
I don't necessarily feel sorry for the women who go on t.v. because of their abusive spouse because they didn't have the sense to leave
0 gravity would be cool but other wise space blows
extreme makeover hippo edition
I think it is funny that they have to warn people not to do dangerous stuff they see on t.v. (I know some idiot would)
c4 is inert. you could throw it against the wall and it won't explode
just a bit of shaking is better then potentially being sucked up and throttled to death (earthquakes vs. tornados).
Super Quad! Able to flop tall buildings in a single flop!
According to Michael (my younger brother) I am the magnificent all knowing quad.
all your base are belong to us
Silence is golden and duct tape is silver
why in the world would you put your gun in the oven?
I wonder if anybody has the surname (last name) Human.
whatever you're looking for is always in the last place you looked. It'd be really odd if you found it but kept looking.
whatever you're looking for is always in the last place you looked. It'd be really odd if you found it but kept looking.
whatever you're looking for is always in the last place you looked. It'd be really odd if you found it but kept looking.
I doubt it, but can a crapload of scarab beetles eat you? I don't think scarab beetles are even carnivorous.
I know it would be terrible to lose a baby, but I imagine it would be worse to lose like a 10 year old because you would have gotten to know them and stuff
I think it is probably a prerequisite to be gay in order to be a male figure skater
I think it is probably a prerequisite to be gay in order to be a male figure skater
I think if god actually had a problem with something he would actually do something about it
''Quad Toss'' sounds like an Olympic event
I don't remember the difference between a geek and a nerd
dude if I got paid to flop that'd be awesome
I think it depends on the order i.e. St. Patrick is Saint Patrick but Patrick st. would be Patrick Street
Yanno, I never noticed it before, but saint & street have the same abbreviation (st.).
pain sucks but it is there for a reason
you know you're drunk when you're riding a lawn tractor naked with a pirate hat and belting out twinkle twinkle little start
it puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again
even the men fight like girls on Jerry Springer
I think the big milestone birthdays are 1, 5, 10, 13, 16, 18, 21, 50 & 100.
Cancer came scuttling back!
I don't think I have ever seen a homely female nerd on television. They're usually like 6s or 7s, where as the guys are usually 2s or 3s at best.
no matter how docile a wild animal gets they are still just that a wild animal it doesn't surprise me that they occasionally kill their trainers
I know about outer space, but what about inner space?
frak is a good way to curse at school and not get in trouble
Oh my god, the guys on Jerry Springer are complete losers. How do they even get and keep girls in the first place?
Oh my god, the guys on Jerry Springer are complete losers. How do they even get and keep girls in the first place?
Just once I would like to see the security let the guests beat the snot out of each other on Jerry Springer.
why do NASCAR drivers wear helmets?
If deaf people have a strike, do they sign ''What do we want?'' ''(thing)'' ''When do we want it?'' ''NOW!''
who in their right mind would go on Jerry Springer?
I wonder if on government forms Michael Jackson could check off that he was African-American or Caucasian later in life.
Peter piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
1 fish 2 fish red fish blue fish
dot the t's and cross the i's
can you even actually control your eyelids when you are asleep? (referring to the statement ''sleep with one eye open'') I don't think so.
It probably seems a little odd that I get excited about stuff that doesn't seem like a big deal to the rest of you (like taking a shower or going to a movie), but keep in mind I can't just get up whenever I want & do stuff.
I got to take an actual shower. I know that seems like a silly statement to the rest of you, but I have only had sponge baths for the past couple years.
Stuff about things that could kill you (like animals) in other countries makes me really glad I live in the United States.
Do like whales & fish have to actually drink water like land animals?
bear grills is a special brand of crazy
it is bull that actors get awards for relitivly unimportant crap
I wonder why a part of a building is called a wing
it doesn't seem fair that actors get awards for relitivly unimportant crap
I don't necessarily think I am afraid of heights or falling but of the sudden stop at the end
what is the currency in Honduras?
what is the currency in Honduras?
like an individual person is smart and stuff but people en mass are stupid panicky animals
like an individual person is smart and stuff but people en mass are stupid panicky animals
seriously what are the chances your heart will catch on fire
now, vin diesel, THAT is a premium chunk of man meat
Super Quad! Able to flop tall buildings in a single flop!
surgeons get excited about weird crap
I heard doctors make the worst patients
I don't know what u s o even means
industry grade diamonds look nothing like jewelery grade diamonds
with a name like killer whale it doesn't surprise me that they occasionally kill people
