Sara is having a real hard time dealing with the breakup. She's so sad. What makes things worse is that she can't cry - can't do the physical act of crying - so she has no outlet other than talking. Since her friends have not really been coming around that means she is talking to her nurses and me over and over about it. Somehow it isn't the same.
Then today I realized something that just makes me ache for her (besides the obvious)...she seems to be having trouble with short-term memory. Kind of like Groundhog Day. Every day has been like Monday to her. She has started off the day sad telling the nurse or me that Daniel broke up with her yesterday. I didn't realize until today that she has kind of lost track of days and when things have happened. So, all week she's gone through the event over and over as if it just happened, and is not able to cry. She has not shown any other signs of memory issues (quite to the contrary). Her head nurse and I were discussing today that the magnitude of the loss to her of Daniel could have been trauma enough to bring this on.
So we've discussed a few things to try and help her through this - memory exercises, putting up a white board with the day and date on it, encouraging a blog entry daily, and giving her friends calls to see if they can stop by and give her a chance to talk here and there.
I understand that her condition is a lot for anybody to get their head around. Nobody more than Sara understands that. But its still the same Sara inside - goofy, smart, loving. She's getting better very, very slowly. But she needs something that I can't buy, medicine can't prescribe, and only her friends can provide.
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I just wanted to let you know that I'm hoping to be able to stop by and see Sara on Sunday. Hoping, mind you, but I'll try.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I don't think it's fair to hurt Daniel by nearly blaming this on him. Second only to Sara and her immediate family, he's the one who has been affected by this hardship most, and he needs that acknowledged. Don't really want to start a fight, I'm just airing my grievances.
Sara honey I wish I could wrap my arms around you and give you a great big hug because nobody knows a broken heart better than I do. It's a long way from Plattsburgh, NY to you, but I can wrap my heart and my love around you. Breaking up is so very painful and if it helps I have cried for you. And I have cried for Daniel too because this has to be hard on him too. My phone is acting up right now, but I am trying to get it fixed and as soon as I do you can feel free to call me anytime. I will be glad to send you my number.
ReplyDeleteAs a person who also struggles with memory loss I can tell you firsthand that trauma and stress bring it on and it should go away when you are feeling less sadness. When I get upset sometimes I cannot remember the simplest things. It is frustrating, but it should pass. I would love to see you get on here and write more often.
With all of the progress you are making I think you should make some long term and short term goals that you would like to accomplish. Share them with us if you would and keep us informed of your progress.
Here's what I always tell myself when a guy hurts me. "Good looking guys come a dime a dozen and they are getting cheaper every day." I hope that made you smile.
I have never met you in person only through the words that your mother writes, you write, and Victoria's grandmother Edie tells me and I have come to care so much about you. You are so amazing and so beautiful. Don't you get discouraged. Bad times happen for everyone. I am going through my own hard times right now and I can't help but think you are an angel God put in my life to help me get through my stuff by witnessing your strength and your courage. You are truly a blessing Miss Sara and don't you ever forget that.
I love you!
Hey Kristina, My email address is bailey.kimberlya@gmail.com if you send me your email address I can try to get some pictures of the area up here and send them to Sara and see if that cheers her up some. I also have pictures from my sister's trip to Alaska this summer with Orca, glaciers, seals, sea otters, moose and I have a video of a 300 pound bear cub that my 8 year old niece took from inside the house as it as was outside in the middle of her little sisters toys. I hope that she perks up soon. Broken hearts are so hard. Feel free to write me anytime I will be there the best that I can. Take care and God bless you.
ReplyDeleteHey Sara,
ReplyDeleteI'd like to visit you guys sometime next week when I'm free. Is Wednesday okay?
I wish I was closer.
ReplyDeleteTo mom: If she wants, I wouldn't mind calling her and talking on the phone. She could type to me and I could wait and reply.
I have an idea of how to raise some more money for the computer she needs to get back online. If you have time to call me and chat about it, I can tell you more. I feel like if she could at least be online again then she could really start reconnecting and feeling like she a part of something again.
To Glory: Lots and lots of love and hugs. I know you are sad and I know it hurts, but I'm thinking of you and I'm here for you if you want to talk.
I have prayed for Sara since I heard about her accident and I have logged on to her blog every day to read the progress she has made and I'm sure she will continue to make. I also have seen the love and support that Daniel gave to her this whole year. Daniel should be commended for the support he gave to Sara, not blamed. He is a young man who has to go on with his life. I'm sure it took alot for Daniel to realize that he had to live his life too. There's nothing wrong with that. There is no way that Sara's setback should be blamed on Daniel, especially by putting that on a blog. I love my Grandson Daniel as much as Sara's mother loves her. I think that even hinting that Daniel was to blame for anything is hurtful and wrong. Sara is always in my prayers and I hope one day she will be fully recovered.
ReplyDeleteDaniel's Grandma Delores
As an objective parent, Kristina is not indicating that Daniel is to blame, she is merely commenting that the breakup was difficult for Sara as most breakups are! To Sabrina and To Delores: You are both taking this "out of context!"I am surprised at the two of you!! I thought you both know Kristina and that she would never blame Daniel! She does not need this! Apparently you both do not really know Kristina!
ReplyDeleteI think it is very important for people to understand that I have never blamed Daniel for a single thing. I love that kid.
ReplyDeleteI wasn't going to put anything about it on the blog until Sara did so herself.
If you happened to be privvy to the first conversation after her accident between Daniel, Me, his parents and my son, then you'd know that I acknowledged that this would probably be too much for someone his age. I told him when he got to that point it would be ok. Just tell me so I could prepare her. I did ask him not to do it in the first few weeks.
He stayed with her for an entire year and until she was home. For that I am grateful.
That being said, I blog what I blog. I have always tried to tell what was going on with her, share the road we are currently on, in an open way. The fact that she just sustained a significant loss, ANY loss, and it is affecting her mentally, emotionally, physically, I am going to share. It just so happens that the loss she is experiencing is that of her beloved Daniel.
Let's focus back on Sara. Daniel can speak for himself, act for himself, and do whatever makes him happy. I'm going to miss him and the love that he showed to my daughter. But I do understand. And anybody who doesn't hear that in my post, or has read that in the pages of this blog, is missing a big piece of the spirit of what I share.
Peace.
Tonight on 60 minutes the following features a well known doctor Scott A. Mackler, M.D., Ph.D. who 9 years ago was diagnosed with Lou Gehrigs Disease which exasperated Locked In Syndrome. He continues to practice medicine in Philidelphia and with his wife and childrens support is doing exceptionally well communicating via a specialized computer system.
ReplyDeleteBRAIN POWER - People who are completely paralyzed due to illness or trauma are getting help communicating with a new technology that connects their brains to a computer. In the future, brain computer interface, or BCI, may restore movement to paralyzed people and allow amputees to move bionic limbs.
Kristina check out his name via the search engine
Sara, I think of you often and wish I could visit but we moved from Ca to Oregon this summer. When we get back to Ca for a visit I hope I can pop in to see you. You are a remarkable, strong person. I wish we could both be back in Martial Arts class hitting each other with our padded weapons.
ReplyDeleteSara, you are an absolutly amazing woman. I've never met you, but I feel like I have. I have followed this blog since a few days after your accident - and had even heard stories of you before your accident.
ReplyDeleteYou have an amazing strength and will power that is evident simply by reading of you and the overwhelming progress you've made. I hope you keep finding renewed strenght to keep on with that progress. And maybe this break up is that strenth. I know what it is like to love someone and have a bond like you and Daniel had - although you both obviously had a profound connection that resulted from being together through this. The man in your life fills a void no one else can - not your mother, not your friends male or female. He obviously was a man of great character. So, it is OK to be sad. You have to greive the loss of this person in your life. But realize, everything happens for a reason. While Daniel might of been someone you turned to for a different kind of support - and he with you. Now it may be time to reach out to others for support. You have the ability to communicate - which is an amazing gift, something that MANY people that have not been through are not as blessed with. I urge you to use it. There are countless people like myself that read this blog every day - that would love to help you in your recovery in any way we can. And maybe that help is giving you an outlet to share and get feedback. Reach out to us. Reach out to your friends, I'm sure they would love to help in any way they can. People are obviously drawn to you - to your courage, strength and story. They would love to help, they just need something to do :) Reach out to them to be your new support system.
I wish you, as I have from the day I learned of your accident, the best of luck. I hope you make the fullest recovery possible, and learn every lesson and see every blessing and opportunity in this possible. - Ashley
The article is up on DA here, if you'd like to read all the replies: http://news.deviantart.com/article/61512/
ReplyDeleteIt's been a great response so far!!!!
I noticed that sarascourage.org is down when I went there to get LiS links.
Hi...
ReplyDeleteCall me 'Ryu'. :)
I just read about what happened to Sara, thanks to one of her friends who is trying to help out. I wish the best of luck and health. I pray for you in my heart. If you live in Southern CA I would love to try and go visit and help out however I could. If you want I'll bring some pictures of a trip to Japan I took two years ago, and I'll just... try to get Sara's mind off of things.
Much love
My email is altosaxbandiedusk@yahoo.com
I just heard about Sara recently through deviantart, and I wanted to stop by and share my prayers and love. I'm really rooting for her!
ReplyDeleteHy,
ReplyDeleteYou don't know me and I don't know you, but I read about you on DA.
It's just so unfair that things like this happen...
I really don't know what to say, but I just wanted to let you know that there's this girl from Holland that hopes that things get better for you soon *hug*
Sara Sara Sara! Hang in there!! I am a fellow deviantmember, I go by Tristan-the-Dreamer on Da. We are trying to help you all we can on Da, we are thinking of you! Be strong as you can, I know things must be so hard! Here is a virtual hug from me to you: HUGGGG!
ReplyDeleteYou are a living story of inspiration ,courage and hope.And since i heard about your accident you and your mother haven't left my prayers,as i have said before,i may not know you very well (if at all) but i have always looked up to you because of your wonderful art, and i can't wait till you can return to us. I believe in you i know you can make it. There are a lot of people on DA and on ToT that Miss and love you very much.Please never forget that.
ReplyDeleteI may be in Southern California but if you ever and i mean EVER wanna talk about anything just let me know.
I will keep praying for you. Much love to you and your family.
please feel free to email me:
jennylee9788@yahoo.com
or if you want my phone number
just ask ^_^
Hey Sarah! I hope you're doing okay! We deviants on dA are doing our best to raise money for you to get that new technology. We're all rooting for you and hoping you'll soon be drawing again!
ReplyDeleteSakky and I made a gift for you in the meantime to remind you that we're all here for you!
Sailor Saturn
Hi. I come here from deviantart, and although I can't donate, I'm doing my best to help to spread the word (as so many others). I hope we can together get Sarah back online, at least! My thoughts and prayers are with you, brave people.
ReplyDeleteIs there any way we can send her giftart (even an email address would do fine)? I'm sure more then one fellow deviant would want to make some for her, it could help to cheer her up. Lots of love!
I read about you on DeviantArt a while back... And then again today on MoonKitty.net
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry what happened to you. You are a wonderful artist and I wish you the best!
Heather
IttyFox6
>^.^<
Hi Sara,
ReplyDeleteYou don't know me, and the truth is I don't know you either. But, I've just read about you in an article at deviantart and I want to send you my best wishes and salutes from Serbia (yes, people got the chance to hear about you here too! hehe). Your story deeply touched me and even more the great strength you carry within. I truly wish you all the best because you truly deserve it.
Many oversea hugs and kisses,
Milica
Hi Sara
ReplyDeleteI'm Louise aka originalkitten from Deviant Art. I saw a post about you there and I had to come see your blog. I am from England and wish I was closer so I could come spend time with you and let you know everything is going to be ok.
You are an incredible brave lady who has gone through so much. You make my current ill health and problems seem so ... bland. You give me strength because you are so incredibly strong. I am a 34 single mum of two young boys. I wish you could meet them. I know they would love to meet such a strong lady as yourself.
Re your break up sweetie. It will get better. Heartache is horrible. Believe me I know it first hand but it makes you even stronger as a person. I know it's just words from a stranger but trust me on this.. days will get easier... and you will find one day, you wake up and he isn't your first thought.
Sweetie I just want you to know my thoughts and prayers are with you. If you ever want to email me contact me at deviant art. www.originalkitten.deviantart.com and Ill give you my email address huney.
Keep being that strong inspriational girl.
Love n hugs n prayers
Louise xoxox
Hi Sara
ReplyDeleteI keep checking in and I am learning so much about you from your friends on deviantart. Do you have some art on there that I could see. I never heard of it before now so someone would have to guide me to find your art if you have some on there. It is so cool that you are meeting all these people from around the world. Remember, it is when it is darkest that stars shine their brightest. I don't know who originally said that but you are a STAR so shine your light.
God bless you Sara. You are so very special! HUGS AND KISSES!!!
http://gloryangel.deviantart.com/
ReplyDeletethis is Saras deviant art page Kim :)
Hi Sarah, I read about your story and struggle through a news article on DeviantArt and I wanted to come by and leave you my wishes for your recovery.
ReplyDelete*hugs*
Thank you Louise and Daniel for getting me the information. Sara, you are an incredible artist. I can't wait until January when I have some money I am going to be buying some then. I have a sister Robyn and she will love that print. I am contacting people to see about helping raise some money for you. Keep your chin up and your smile on. YOU ARE AWESOME!
ReplyDelete