Reality Check

We got a bunch of equipment into the house today. It is exciting and a little depressing at the same time. Exciting to be getting her home..depressing that she's coming home in different shape than she left.

I was thinking about the day of her accident. She slept as long as possible. Got up. Grumpy at first until she drank a big glass of orange juice and checked her email. Then she got her work scrubs on, got her book bag for school and was off to her day.

Never in a million years would I have imagined that she wouldn't come home...or that it would be the last time I would hear her happy chirpy voice (for who knows how long...ever?..)...or that she would go from perfectly healthy, happy, working, loving, going to school, on her way to the future she wanted to where she is now...in an instant.

But she IS coming home. I know that it could be worse. Some kids never come home and that's that. She and I have been in the next room a couple of times when someone else had to let their teenager go because they really were brain dead... we counted our blessings and sent our most loving thoughts to the other family. The first time we cried..feeling a little guilty at the relief that it wasn't her.

There is so much ahead, for her, for us all. And plenty of adjustments to do and considerations I never even thought about before. But the alternatives, her having died or living in a skilled nursing facility, are just not what is right for my little girl.


On a lighter note...we figured out why door jambs are wider...LOL. Can't move the wheelchair from the living room to anywhere. Have to remove a door jamb. We're already tearing out the bathroom (to get rid of the mold mainly), but it will be easier to get her cleaned in a shower. I won't even be able to get her in the house if I don't get that ramp built. I guess Saturday is the day for that. Michael will be gone to his fathers house, and Mike will be with Sara. I'm actually looking forward to building it.